Just a Little Modification

Apparently, Nerf guns are just not good enough these days. Check out youtube and you will see "How To" videos demonstrating ways you can "modify" your Nerf gun so that it shoots harder, faster, and farther. Just in case you need to take out an eye or pierce a tree trunk with a foam bullet. I know this because my son came to me, exasperated and agitated, sweat dripping from his downy-blond temples. We'll call him Max, after the tyke in "Where the Wild Things Are" because he too has his King of the Wild Things moments. Bless him.

"Can you unscrew this?" he asked, handing me a neon yellow Nerf gun and a tiny screwdriver. He pointed at the minuscule screws that held the gun together. "I need to modify it."

"Wait, wait, wait...what?"

After he briefed me on the procedure and showed me the video, I wanted to see for myself what this modification would do to an ordinary Nerf gun. Plus, I love a challenge, as you will see. We eventually got the screws off, after soaking a few of them in spray-on canola oil, which is a single mom's version of WD-40. Now, to open the chamber. In the video, it slides apart with ease, then onto the next step. But wait...this thing wasn't budging. Sucker was GLUED.

So, I guess the Good People at Nerf have caught wind of these "modifications" and either don't want the liability, or just don't want kids (or me) to have any fun at all. Max started whining and I could see a Kingly moment coming on.

"Chill out," I said. "Hold on just one second here..." I started googling How do I modify my glued Nerf gun? "They aren't winning that easily." He watched over my shoulder as I started sifting through the results on how to get around this obstacle. See, I will do anything to avoid grading research papers.

It was around this time that I started asking myself, What exactly am I teaching my son right now? Is this a lesson in never giving up? In how to find the answers to problems? In staying committed to a project regardless of unanticipated difficulty? Or was I showing him how to buck the system? How to break the rules? How to mess with things that aren't even broken? How not to be content with things as they really are?

I decided this was too many questions to deal with while trying to buck the system and modify a perfectly good Nerf gun, so I soldiered on through the links. Finally, I found a posting by someone who said nail polish remover "did the trick." Now, I may be an English teacher, but I was an excellent science student as well. I recall that the stuff in nail polish remover that is so handy-dandy is acetone, and my polish remover was the pink "acetone-free" stuff. So, after a quick trip to Publix (we take our gun modifications seriously in this family), we were soaking that chamber in a ziploc full of acetone.

Sure, it made the plastic kinda rubbery (temporarily), but a few minutes later, I was able to pry that sucker apart! Take THAT, Good People at Nerf.

So, it's all modified, put back together, and screwed shut. It's still a little greasy still from the canola, but I told Max that you clean real guns with oil, so it's more authentic this way. He nodded and shrugged. I think he bought it. Anyway, how does it shoot?

Like a dream! Much stronger and more accurate, just like the kid on the video claimed it would be. Thanks, JordanSkate23!

Now the bigger question: what did I teach Max through this modification ordeal? Well, the look on his face after that first shot made it all worthwhile. Maybe we do need to break the rules sometimes, as long as we don't hurt anyone, or shoot an eye out. Maybe even when things might be okay as they are, we could all stand some improvement. Bettering ourselves, and our lives, and our foam weaponry is ultimately a worthy endeavor. And lastly, I think I showed him that only those who don't give up end up hitting their mark. You can't hit a target if you aren't aiming at it. So take aim, son.

And when life gives you glue...go to Publix and get acetone.